Service for John

Memorial for John
To everything there is a season,
a time for every purpose under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
a time to kill and a time to heal ...
a time to weep and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance ...
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to lose and a time to seek;
a time to rend and a time to sew;
a time to keep silent and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war and a time for peace.
ecclesiastes 3:1-8

We come together today because it is our time to mourn the loss of a friend, a partner, a papa. But it is also a time for us to laugh as well as weep, to remember John Douglass and the good things of his life.

John had a wide and eclectic range of interests, from music to books, from camping to computers. He had a big heart, capable of welcoming many as friends and as family, not only family by blood, but family by choice. Few mature bachelors are capable of welcoming into their house and heart not only a woman to be their life partner, but her four half-grown daughters as well. John not only accepted the girls but became a papa to them.

In the last season of his life he forged a family, a family that has weathered the storms of adolescence, ill-health, and financial strain. Many more conventional families would not have survived. They were a family in the truest and deepest sense, people who sacrificed for each other, who supported each other, in good times and bad.

All of us here are part of John's family, by simple virtue of our love and respect for him. Some of us closer than others, but all of us are here to gain comfort and strength from each other. Let us take a moment of silence to pray and give thanks for having had him a part of our lives, or to meditate on John's life, and our interactions with him.....

In closing, I'd like to share with you my memory of the last time I saw John. I work in a convenience store, and John came in. He was having difficulty walking, and was obviously in pain. He came up to my counter and spoke, asking how I was doing, and about the rest of my household. We chatted a minute or two, and he said he needed to sit down and rest before heading home. I will always remember the grace with which he spoke. Despite pain and exhaustion, he was pleasant and even humorous. Of other times, I think mostly I'll remember his ability to come up and tell the most ridiculous jokes with a straight face. His humor is something I'll miss.

Thank you all for being here. I'd like to invite anyone who wishes to share a memory or story with us all. May our shared memories lighten grief.